SR Blog - Supreme Court Ruling on Same-Sex Marriage

What does the Bible say about homosexuality? How are Christians supposed to respond to those people in their lives who support same-sex marriage? I have decided to write a response to address the whirlwind of debates surrounding the recent Supreme Court decision that prohibits all 50 states from denying same-sex marriage licenses in a 5-4 vote. I am fearful. My fear is not that some will disagree with me, but that somehow my heart will become lost in the words. As I begin, I want to start by laying a little groundwork. First, as a Christian, I am obligated to approach this topic with allegiance to Jesus, including His stance on morality and His approach to people who are engaged in lifestyle choices that are contrary to morality as He defines it. Secondly, I will make it my aim to separate the political discussion from the moral discussion. I am a pastor so I will leave the politics to those who are more informed and opinionated than I am about how Christians should engage in the political arena. Lastly, I want to divide the topic into the two categories of (1) biblical morality and (2) how Christians are commanded to respond to those who engage in lifestyles that are inconsistent with biblical principles. 

As someone who believes in the resurrection of Jesus, I have staked my life on the fact that I believe Jesus truly is the Son of the Living God. Therefore, I am willingly obligated to adjust my moral compass according to His nature and character as revealed in the Bible and submit myself to His divine authority over the created universe as the chief agent of morality and Truth. I choose to lay down the notion that my existential ideas and my ability to reason are higher than His. Regardless of what makes sense to me at any given moment in my life, I must submit my mind and heart to the mind and heart of Jesus.

Over the last 9 years as a pastor, I have spent a great deal of my time studying the Bible’s view and instructions on sexuality, marriage, divorce, and remarriage. I believe the Bible clearly and proactively defines God’s view on marriage as the union between one man and one woman for a lifetime covenant (Genesis 2:18-25; Ephesians 5:21-33; Matthew 19:3-9; 1 Corinthians 7:1-16; Revelation 19:6-10). Whether you view these Bible verses literally or symbolically, the Bible unmistakably presents God’s definition of marriage as the God-ordained union between one man and one woman for a lifetime covenant. In addition, I believe the Bible also clearly renders all sexual activity outside of a covenant marriage between a man and a woman as sin (Romans 1:24-27, 7:1-3; Matthew 5:27-30, 15:19; 1 Corinthians 5:1-2; 1 Corinthians 6:12-20; Galatians 5:19-21; Ephesians 5:1-5; Colossians 3:5). 

Before I address the Christian’s biblical response to those who choose to agree with same-sex marriage, I want to discuss the primary arguments I hear in favor of same-sex marriage. There are some who argue that sexual activity is purely biological because sexuality involves hormonal and physiological activity that causes chemical endorphin release, stimulating the body towards strong desire. This argument implies that sexuality is a biological discussion rather than a moral issue. If this is true, and biology is determined by genetics, this argument concludes that sexuality is genetically predisposed and therefore, can’t be considered a moral choice (nature). In a similar way, there are those who argue that sexuality can also be imprinted or influenced by experience and the pressure of cultural norms. This argument concludes that what a person experiences in life can determine or alter a person’s sexual orientation (nurture). In other words, a person may be born genetically predisposed with certain sexual tendencies, however other external factors are involved in fully shaping a person’s sexuality. If these two arguments are all that is considered, sexuality is not solely in the hands of the individual person, but results from factors beyond a person’s autonomous control providing freedom from personal responsibility or moral obligation. I realize that there are many within conservative evangelical circles that do not consider nature or nurture as legitimate influences on sexuality and dismiss these arguments all together. However, I have no issue discussing the influence of these variables on sexuality in an effort to understand a person’s individual struggle. However, I believe there is a distinct difference between root cause and influential variables. For me, nature and nurture can play a role as influential variables in sexuality without representing the primary or root cause. As a heterosexual, I may be tempted to have sex with every woman I pass on the street who I think is beautiful. I may be able to reasonably explain to you how my experiences in life, along with my predisposed genetic hormonal drive compel me to have sex with many beautiful women. However, even though nature and nurture may influence my sexual drive, my sexual activity is still a moral issue. The Bible teaches that any sexual activity (heterosexual or homosexual) outside of the marriage between a woman and a man is sin.

Without a static moral compass, I can deflect moral responsibility and justify any form of sexuality according to what I have experienced and the biological factors outside my control.  But as a Christian I must set my moral compass according to the Bible rather than my tainted existential perspectives and my own limited ability to reason. In a universe that I believe was created by Jesus and is governed by His authority, I don’t get to decide what is immoral. The Bible teaches that any desires or impulses that lead to disobedience to God are sin. So, what causes me to naturally want things that Jesus doesn’t want me to have? If I inherently desire things that God doesn’t desire, then there is something inside of me that is bent away from the Holiness of God and towards sin. Inherently, my moral compass is tilted towards pleasing myself in sinful thoughts and activity, doing what feels right. As a result of sin’s influence on the created world, the Bible teaches that natural flesh of man is corrupt and bent towards pleasing itself rather than God. My biological make up includes a sinful nature and my life experiences are impacted by the sinful condition of living in a fallen world. Rather than excusing me from moral responsibility, my biological makeup and life experiences further prove that I cannot trust my natural human intuition because it is corrupted by sin. My sinful nature is just as dark and ugly as any other person who has ever lived. I am as much a sinner as any other human being on earth. This is why I need something outside of myself and outside of the influence of sin in this world to intervene on my behalf, something or someone who is pure and perfect. This is what leads me to the cross. At the cross, Jesus is the perfect sacrifice for my sins. At the cross, I find the great collision between God’s anger towards my sin and God’s grace towards me as His beloved creation. The cross is brutally ugly because my sin is brutally ugly. The cross is also scandalously beautiful because this is the place where God’s grace for us extends beyond human reason and rescues the most unworthy person, inviting us into the perfect righteousness of God to live forever. God’s justice requires a punishment. God’s grace compels a rescue. Jesus took our place on the cross by taking our punishment in order to give us grace in our time of need. It is only by grace through faith that sinners find forgiveness of sin and restoration from the impact of sin’s influence on human nature.

I think it is essential to discuss the difference between struggling with sin and living a sinful lifestyle. Struggling with sin reveals an inward battle between what comes natural and what pleases God. Struggling with sin implies that even though my natural impulse wants to do something, there is something else inside me waging war on my natural impulses calling me away from sin towards the holiness of God. While sin attempts to draw my gaze from holiness to darkness, the Truth of the Bible and the Holy Spirit of God compels me towards the light of Holiness. Just because a person is struggling inwardly with sinful desires, doesn’t mean that person is living in sin. It is good and right for a person who has a natural impulse to lie to struggle against the natural impulse to lie in pursuit of what pleases God. It is good and right for me to resist the natural impulses to have sex with a woman who is not my wife in pursuit of what pleases God. In the same way, it is good and right for the person who has homosexual impulses to struggle against the natural impulse to have sex with someone of the same sex in pursuit of what pleases God. Struggling with sin honors God and leads to holiness. In contrast, a sinful lifestyle reveals that there is no battle. A sinful lifestyle implies that a person has embraced the human impulse of stifling or ignoring any inward struggles to please God rather than self. Grace allows for saved Christians to struggle with sin (Romans 6:1-23, 7:1-25).

This is where I shift the conversation towards the Christian’s response to those who see the world differently. As Christians, we are obligated to see every person the way Jesus sees them and love every person the way Jesus loves them. Thankfully, we don’t have to speculate on how Jesus would treat a person who is engaged in a lifestyle of sexual sin. In John 8:1-11, we find a story where the religious leaders bring a woman to Jesus who they caught in the act of sexual sin. From the biblical account, we know that these leaders were willing to kill the woman with stones if she was convicted. In response to this woman, Jesus makes a beautiful statement about judgment: “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her” (John 8:7). One by one, the men drop their stones and walk away, recognizing that every person has sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. After her accusers leave, Jesus addresses the woman: “Jesus stood up and said to her, ‘Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?’ She said, ‘No one, Lord.’ And Jesus said, ‘Neither do I condemn you;’” (John 8:7-11). If the story ended here, we might conclude that despite Jesus’s stance on sexual sin, Christians are to refrain from calling people away from sin and towards holiness. Jesus ends his conversation with the woman by saying, “from now on sin no more” (John 8:11).   In this example, we see the conversion of grace and truth. The grace of Jesus that forgives our darkest sin collides with the character of Jesus that reveals our smallest neglect of obedience to God. In Jesus we find both infinite mercy and absolute morality. As Christians, we are to drop our stones of punishment without neglecting our convictions for righteousness. There is difference between throwing stones and calling those we love out of sin.

A final distinction is required. In 1 Corinthians 5, Paul sorts sexual immorality into two categories: those within Christianity and those who are outside of Christianity.  

In the first three verses, Paul describes a version of sexual immorality that was taking place within the Christian community in Corinth. His instruction is to remove the sexually immoral person from among the Christians. A misunderstanding of this instruction leads some Christians to feel justified in stiff-arming the LGBT community. As Paul continues, he readdresses his statements in verse 9-13.

⁹ I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people— ¹⁰ not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. ¹¹ But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one. ¹² For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? ¹³ God judges those outside. “Purge the evil person from among you.” 1 Corinthians 5:9-13 ESV

In his follow up explanation, Paul makes it clear that he is not giving the church permission to treat the non-Christian community in a harsh manner. Paul is calling the Christian church to hold the brothers and sisters who proclaim to follow Jesus with accountability. In addition to sexual immorality, he also includes the greedy, idolaters, revilers, drunkards and swindlers. Paul is not calling the church to excommunicate people who struggle with these sins. In honesty and humility, Paul confesses that he is a Christian who also struggles with sin (Romans 7:13-20; 1 Timothy 1:12-17). In 1 Corinthians 5, he is calling the church to confront those who proclaim allegiance to Jesus and yet, indulge in lifestyles that assert defiance to Jesus. Paul sees the destruction that comes from this level of hypocrisy and he has no tolerance for it inside the church. However, he also makes it clear that this doesn’t apply to the lost world. Paul exaggerates his point by declaring that we would have to leave this world in order to completely disassociate with those who are engaged in immoral lifestyles outside of the church.

So, how are Christians commanded to interact with those who see things differently? Six words come to mind:

1. Humility – Resist the slippery slope of hypocrisy. Because every person is born under the influence of a sinful human nature and because all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, there is no room for arrogance for those who follow Jesus. If you find yourself being challenged or in a debate, remember to speak humbly and refuse to become the angry bully or the arrogant know-it-all (Philippians 2:1-3; Colossians 3:12-14; 1 Peter 5:5).

2. Compassion – Resist the temptation to become a moral deist. Morality is about those who God loves reflecting His attributes on earth. You may win the moral argument, but lose the person in the wake of being right. The point of the Gospel is to call people towards God, not win arguments. God’s loving kindness leads sinners towards repentance (Romans 2:4). Temper every word with a deep level of brokenness and compassion for the people you speak with (Matthew 9:10-13, 36, 14:14). Make sure your heart breaks for those who are hurting rather than hurting those who are broken.

3. Conviction – It is possible to stand your ground without being arrogant or rude. Conviction allows you to honestly express what you believe firmly and gently, without using the Bible as a baseball bat (1 Corinthians 4:14, 2 Corinthians, Galatians 6:1, Ephesians 4:1-3). Start with the convictions that serve as foundations for what you believe before rushing towards hard conclusions in order to allow those you talk with to see how you get from A to Z. Be ready to explain your convictions with resolve and without becoming defensive or argumentative (2 Timothy 4:1-5). It’s not judgmental to agree with the Bible’s view on sin. There was a significant contrast between the way Jesus and the religious leaders approached the lady caught in adultery. Judgment involves picking up stones and issuing punishment. Conviction involves gentle honesty. Jesus was able to call the woman who was caught in adultery away from sin in gentleness.

4. Honesty – It isn’t loving or respectable to hide your convictions in order to maintain a false sense of peace between you and another person.   Peace that is contingent on hiding, isn’t really peace (1 John 1:5-10). Strive to walk in honesty. Honesty doesn’t mean that you walk down the street with a bullhorn or wear your convictions on your t-shirt. Honesty means that by faith, you believe that it is healthier to be transparent than to put on a façade. Pretending to not have convictions is the same thing as not having convictions. Convictions require honesty.

5. Grace – But for the grace of God, every person is walking in hopelessness. Every Christian is a direct product of God’s grace washing over their sins (Ephesians 2:1-10). As recipients of grace, Christians must become agents of grace (Romans 5:11; 2 Corinthians 5:11-21). Confronting sin without grace is to present the problem without the solution. Morality without grace is arrogant and hypocritical. The Gospel is incomplete without an honest approach to sin and a passionate invitation towards grace (Ephesians 2:8-9; John 1:17; Romans 3:21-26, 5:12-21).

6. Love – What do you accomplish if at the end of the day, you haven’t loved? The Bible declares that every effort that isn’t rooted in love is a fool’s errand (1 Corinthians 13, Colossians 3:14). You will never engage the fallen world the way Jesus calls you to if you don’t love the fallen world the way Jesus does. Despite disagreements and different views, every person who encounters a Christian should encounter love. Strive to make sure your desire to love your neighbor is greater than your desire to disprove your neighbor (Mark 12:28-34, Luke 10:25-37).

Christians are called to stand firm amidst the ever changing moral currents of the generation with humility, compassion, conviction, honesty, grace and love. Hearts are never changed by winning arguments. Only the work of God can change hearts. By faith, we are to engage the fallen world with loving resolve and trust God to do the rest.